I Went to Aruba Alone at 35 — And Everything Changed

Jun 11
4 min read

Clear turquoise ocean and soft white sand with palapa beach umbrellas at Hilton Aruba — Aruba’s perfect reset formula: soft sand, a steady breeze, and the bluest water I’ve ever seen. Solo travel done right.

In my 20s, I traveled a lot. But it was always for someone else's big moment: weddings, baby showers, bachelorette weekends, dirty-thirty chaos. I loved it, but let's be honest—those trips weren't really mine. They were a blur of celebration and hangovers.

At 35, I was in a completely different place.

I was the heaviest I'd ever been, mentally and physically, weighed down by a life that looked fine on paper but felt off in my bones. I was teaching Pilates — a new path for me at the time — and I called it my "happy job." It energized me. It made other people feel good and, in turn, made me feel good. But outside of that studio? I was lost. Stuck. Depressed and unsure why. And ready for something different.

I needed a reset — just me. No rules. No obligations. No compromises.

So, I booked a solo trip to Aruba.

Why Aruba?

I did my research. It was far enough away to feel like a real escape but still safe, English-speaking, and familiar. Friends had visited and raved. It had soft sand beaches, clear turquoise water, a breeze (translation: no bugs), and plenty to do. It felt like the right place for a first true solo escape.

I booked a room at the Hilton Aruba Caribbean Resort & Casino using points, thanks to my Capital One and Hilton Amex cards. The resort had everything I needed: a spa, casino, restaurants, and a safe, walkable tourist zone. It wasn't about luxury—it was about ease and comfort.

Day One: Silence

I spent my first day entirely in bed. Room service. Steak and a bottle of wine. Balcony time. A bath. A shower. A book. My only goal: decompress. After months (okay, years) of pushing, pleasing, and performing, I gave myself full permission to do nothing. And it was glorious.

Aruba Hilton poolside beach view with ocean breeze, palm trees, and relaxed vacation vibe — Morning mimosas and ocean views — the Hilton’s pool bar became my unofficial office for the week. Reset starts here.

Day Two and Onward: Me, in Motion

I started each day with a mimosa or Bloody Mary and set out on foot to explore. I always check the area by day so I don't get lost at night. I talk to locals, get tips, and learn where to eat and what to avoid.

I booked three activities in total:

A full island tour (which included a cliff jump I still remember vividly)
A snorkel trip with De Palm Tours
The infamous Kukoo Kunuku Drunk Bus

Note to future solo travelers: Do not book your snorkel trip for the morning after the drunk bus. You will survive, but it won't be the most enjoyable experience if you're puking off the side. I was "that girl," the late hot mess that still smelled like alcohol. I did not get sick, although my body was not thrilled with me.

On the boat, the crew was terrific. Once they realized I was solo, they kept an eye on my stuff, made sure I was included, and looked out for me in the best way. Safety matters. Kindness matters. Letting people know you're solo can create more support, not less.

Solo Doesn’t Mean Lonely

I met people when I was in the mood to talk and listen. At the bar. At the casino. I spoke to locals and made friends with the hotel staff. I left notes for housekeeping. I told the front desk when I'd be back. I created a safety net around me, even as I navigated the world alone.

And I stayed alone on purpose. I ate lunch by the pool, kept dinners light, watched the Stanley Cup Playoffs at the Marriott Aruba nearby, and took up space without needing to fill it.

Although… I am aware of my surroundings and any eye candy. A girl deserves some guilty pleasures, too. 😉

My Reset Ritual

At the end of every solo trip, I book a spa treatment. For Aruba, it was a massage and pedicure at the Hilton. I let myself wind down gently. I stocked up on Aruba Aloe products (trust me: buy the after-sun lotion), took a final beach walk, and let the island soak in.

Aruba Hilton eforea spa exterior on a sunny day — I ended every solo trip with a spa session. This one? Massage and pedi at the Hilton’s eforea Spa — and it did not disappoint.

What Changed

I didn't come home healed. I came home different.

I had clarity. I remembered what I liked, what I needed. I stopped drinking to numb. I dropped 10 pounds in 2 years, then another 15 from releasing stress. I started prioritizing movement, meditation, therapy, and better food.

I also started traveling solo once a year: Puerto Rico. Germany. Iceland. Bali. Thailand. Colombia. It became my medicine.

Travel doesn’t fix everything. But it does open something. It clears space. And for me, it showed me who I was when no one else was watching.